If you are like me you seem to get an invitation to a wedding, or wedding shower every other weekend. There are the gifts and the parties and the dresses, especially if you are a bridesmaid, and the shoes and flowers and the list never ends. If you happen to be good friend with the bride you get to be involved in all the details of your friends wedding, which you do not mind because she is your best friend right? Yeah.....Well I have been looking around lately and I feel that everyone else seems to be getting married but me. For awhile now this has made me feel like I am missing out on something and my life is not complete.
THANK GOODNESS I WOKE UP.
I am in a serious relationship with a wonderful man. Does he have his faults?( Don't we all?) But I know he loves me more than anything on this planet. Lately though I have been crazed about getting engaged and married and babies and mortgages together...(I know mortgages right I have lost it!) But today I realized a few things.
I am happy with the man I am dating. I am happy that I still have the freedom that comes with not being married. I also realized that I do not need a man or a wedding to validate me as a person.
Marriage is hard work. Girls, I hope you realize that you will never change a man. Please do not go into a marriage with the plans to change him; IT IS NOT GOING TO HAPPEN. Men, women change. The fantasy we will always look like we did when we were 21 is simply that...a fantasy.
I look around and see these young women who are barely legally allowed to have a glass of wine having a big white wedding and they haven't even lived yet. I also look around and see girls/women/men/boys marrying a person after six months of dating. Can you really know a person well enough to make a life long commitment after 6 months?
True everyone is different and ready for different things in life at different stages, but I have been reflecting on my own life and realize when its right for us we will make that step. There is no need to rush a life long commitment.
Women, we have had so many of our predecessors fight for us so we could be our own person and live our own lives and did not need to feel like an old maid at 20 if we were not engaged. Honor them by being happy with yourself first before you look to a man( or even another woman) to give you happiness.
Learn to love yourself and embrace what individual qualities make you...you. The white dress and sparkly ring and all that will come. I just realized for me personally that I could be happy for my friends and their choices, but that didn't mean my life choices made me any less then them.
THE MORAL of this post is to be happy with where you are in life! WE are Young, Beautiful, Smart, Unique, Wonderful Women!!!! Embrace yourself and enjoy being yourself before you get hung up on being a twosome FOREVER! life is full of amazing things and yes marriage is one of them, but it is not the only one.
Hope you were moved,blessed,touched, or something in someway if you read this.
Talk to you soon!
-E
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